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But here's a bit of encouraging news: Those insecurities are probably all in your head, and that's especially true if you're a woman.
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Do you find it hard to speak up in meetings and other group settings?
The social dynamics of a group setting can actually lower the IQ scores of some people, according to a recent study led by scientists at the Virginia Tech Carilion Research Institute. The researchers used functional magnetic resonance imaging, or fMRI, to spy on the brains of people working in small groups.
They tested the volunteers' IQ to get a baseline figure, then (cruelly) shared those scores with the group. Now everyone in those little groups knew where they stood, intelligence-wise -- and knowing their rank was enough to shake the confidence of some group members, particularly among the women. The participants were again given an IQ test, and even though initially all the subjects scored above average, the second test showed a much wider range of scores.
Researchers then divided the study subjects up into two groups based on their second IQ test to perform a series of tasks: the smarties with the higher scores versus the relative dunces with the lower scores. Of the 13 women who participated in the study, just three of them ended up in the higher-scoring group -- the rest landed with the dunces.
"The way we organize our business is completely built around small groups," Read Montague, co-author of the study and director of the Human Neuroimaging Laboratory and Computational Psychiatry Unit at the Virginia Tech Carilion Research Institute, told TODAY.
"We used to think that ranking the group and rating the group provides a measure -- how are you performing in your job -- but in fact maybe in some settings that damages the performance of the group in ways you don't want to damage it."
Remember, this divide only happened after everyone discovered how they ranked in intelligence as compared to the rest of the group. One theory: Women might be more sensitive to social cues, and more likely to worry about the perceptions of others -- which might mean, in the real world, some great ideas aren't being shared.
But on the bright side, as one woman told TODAY producers in an earlier interview, that sensitivity could also be considered a strength. "Let's use that to our advantage," said Joanna Stone Herman. "And let's actually be stronger and communicate better, because we know that we are picking up on these cues better, and we may be able to be that much more impactful."
This morning on TODAY, Ann Curry chatted with psychologist Jennifer Hartstein and Ivanka Trump, executive vice president of development and acquisitions for the Trump organization, about the study's implications. Hartstein offered some practical advice for anyone -- man or woman -- who often feels shy or tongue-tied in meetings.
"Maybe you need to practice what it is you want to say to someone," Hartstein suggests. "Or maybe you need to go to your manager before and say, 'Hey, I have a lot of things I want to bring to the table today. Can you make sure you put me on the agenda?' Or maybe managers even need to start to think about it differently and say, 'Everybody’s going to have a chance to say something in the meeting today, so be prepared, be ready.'"
What strategies or mantras have you turned to in order to find the courage to pipe up in an intimidating setting? Share your secrets and find tips from like-minded folks on our Facebook page.
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Hat tip to our pals at Life Inc., who initially covered this study for TODAY.com: Meetings can make you, uh, stupid
Leave a Comment:
Ms. Dahl....very hard for us hard working, speak up in (and running) meetings woman to take this seriously when you interview Donald Junior. What can she really know about working for it, or speaking up for it? She'll never really have to worry about paying the bills, proving herself, just that her lipstick is perfect for Daddy's TV show. She's heir to an empire, so it's hard for us bill paying women to relate.
Angie, these kinds of comments do such a dis-service for women. It is assumptive and demeaning. And does nothing to champion women.
I imagine Ivanka, and others like her, bump up against this "silver spoon" stereotype often. What is the point of it, except to display resentment?
This is not a stupid woman - Ivanka. She is educated - a degree in economics. She is an author and a business woman in her own right. The fact that she has had a leg up through her family pedigree means that she has had to work harder to prove herself, because of the significant microscope she is under. This is a woman who has paved her own way, found her own spotlight (which she handles with poise and grace), and is most certainly paying her own bills.
Let's hold her up, and all women, who have the courage to find their own voice, and use it. Here is to success for us all.
This is a topic near and dear to my heart. For years I encountered the same personal hesitations during board meetings because of my mistaken beliefs that others' opinions were more important than mine until one fine day I totally asserted myself and what came out surprised even me.
That incident gave birth to something I call: Cleavage in the Boardroom and the importance for women to show their Intellectual Cleavage (TM) - Yes, SMART IS SEXY, so much so, I even created an on-line program to help others be fully self-expressed: teleclasses#cleavage
Allow your Intellectual Cleavage to show how smart you really are, and relish the moment. It's your secret weapon to success in all areas of your life!
way to go Ali! Yes, SMART is so SEXY!
Thanks Deborah. I feel very passionate about we, the Women, starting the SMART IS SEXY Revolution. What a way to make a difference! Viva Cleavage in the Boardroom!
I try to speak up when I know someone is incorrect in the information they are providing. However, the male form in attendance don't want to hear a woman speak. So, I just keep my mouth shut try to work on getting certifications so that I can find another company that will appreciate the intelligent women they have on board. Men just don't like the thought of being proved wrong, nor do they want to overtaken by a woman. They are control freaks and it's aggravating as heck. Don't they realize that their decisions aren't ALWAYS the right decision?
According to the structuration theory developed by British sociologist Anthony Giddens (1984), the core of any social system consists of individuals choosing how to act in diverse social settings. Small groups prove the most important of these social contexts because it is in the group that we experience a “small-scale society,” one large enough to simulate larger social patterns but small enough to change its rules and behavioral patterns. (May, Steve; Munshi, Debashish; Cheney, George. The Handbook of Communication Ethics (ICA Handbook Series; p. 148.) While I do agree that small groups are the best way to form communication in social contexts, I believe that it actually starts with intrapersonal communication. In your video, I believe that is the critical piece for women in the workplace.
If someone were to ask me what I thought the IQ’s were of men and women in a small group social setting, I would say that my answer would line up pretty close with your findings. As you stated, “In a social setting between men and women, IQ’s were tested and some went down. Of the IQ’s that go down, 80% were women.” I truly believe that my worries about perceptions that others might have of me cause me to clam up. However, I will have to use this sensitivity to be stronger and communicate better because I know that I really am picking up on things, I just have to keep my head up and stay confident. As Samantha mentioned… the question that lingers; do women need to adapt or do businesses? I believe businesses do. It’s 2012 and women are 48% of the workforce. It’s hard to believe that one day women could actually be the leader of gender in the workforce and it’s exhilarating to me as a young professional woman.
In my graduate program, we read about “demonstrating one’s own behavior to match specific prototypes.” This is where group members work hard to demonstrate that their own behavior matches their group’s prototype and to show how their group’s behavior, attitudes, and values contrast with those typical of disliked “out groups.” Specifically, we strive to show our group as distinctive and just, right, or moral. (May, Steve; Munshi, Debashish; Cheney, George. The Handbook of Communication Ethics p. 160.)
I think many women (in the professional world small group setting,) have similar biology makeup that forces us to want to be recognized in a group setting where we are considered as part of the “in group.” Being surrounded by experienced males, for me, was the most intimidating factor for me as I am in my mid-twenties and wanted to be just as smart and accepted from the get-go from my boss and co-workers. However, my male boss valued my position and continued to work with me and train me at higher levels. We would go to meetings with customers and I wouldn’t speak and would just clam up. However, my boss was teaching me to how to develop small group communications skills by listening and learning. I didn’t understand at the time, but he was testing me to see if I was able to comprehend what I was hearing during these small group conversations. As I read this week, interpersonal communication ethics is not about "me" or "you"; it is about a co-constituted communicative benchmark or standard that calls both parties to accountability for something that defines interpersonal communication-the relationship. (Ronald C. Arnett; Janie Harden Fritz; Leeanne M. Bell. Communication Ethics Literacy: Dialogue and Difference (Kindle Locations 1684-1685.)
I think it’s very important for working women to have experienced men and women that they look up to in their environment. You should always surround yourself with people who make you better and challenge you…it’s been a critical key to my success.
This segment was endlessly touted as proof that women's brains are wired differently. Ann Curry even repeated this claim several times. Yet, I fail to see anything in this report that indicates that any actual brain wiring differences between women and men were detected. Everything described here could be the result of socialization. Note: Simply mentioning the name of a high-tech piece of equipment and showing images of brain scans is not enough. Is this bad reporting, or am I missing something?
Hello all,
I'm weighing in as a lifelong corporate communication coach and author with ten observations based on research and experience with hundreds of clients:
1.The most important factor which affects amount of participation in a group is status relative to role or title. People with power are "allowed" to talk more.
2. The second most important factor, male or female, is COMFORT speaking in groups. Some folks like more reflection time and are frequently described by others as smart, but non contributors in a group setting. I divide group behavior into the talkatives, the reticence and the mid range. The goal is for the talkers to talk less and the reticence to contribute more.
3. The hardest situation for my female clients is when they are in a male dominated meeting with insensitive males, in other words, communication sexism. This is the worst situation of all for women. Find a coping or exit strategy.
4. Common sense but worth noting: Both genders speak more when they are subject matter experts-- when they know what they are talking about.
5. The amount of talking may not always be as important as the value of the statement. Don't underestimate a strong voice, fluency, speed and brilliant remarks.
One "high level" comment may be worth five ordinary questions.
6. The facilitator or the leader of the group can play an enormous role in helping participants feel comfortable and included. A simple statement such as "I'd like everyone to weigh in on_______" works meeting miracles.
7. In terms of image, women always have a trickier road. They are expected to be nice. So go for competence AND warmth.
8. Speak up early to build momentum. Set a goal for the number of "participation opportunities you will take"
9. The research indicates that one third of a meeting is a waste of time for you. Use that one third to plan what you want to say.
10. We do have control over our communication. Coach yourself and seek resources to add to your speaking up toolkit.
Hello all,
I'm weighing in as a lifelong corporate communication coach and author with ten observations based on research and experience with hundreds of clients:
1.The most important factor which affects amount of participation in a group is status relative to role or title. People with power are "allowed" to talk more.
2. The second most important factor, male or female, is COMFORT speaking in groups. Some folks like more reflection time and are frequently described by others as smart, but non contributors in a group setting. I divide group behavior into the talkatives, the reticence and the mid range. The goal is for the talkers to talk less and the reticence to contribute more.
3. The hardest situation for my female clients is when they are in a male dominated meeting with insensitive males, in other words, communication sexism. This is the worst situation of all for women. Find a coping or exit strategy.
4. Common sense but worth noting: Both genders speak more when they are subject matter experts-- when they know what they are talking about.
5. The amount of talking may not always be as important as the value of the statement. Don't underestimate a strong voice, fluency, speed and brilliant remarks.
One "high level" comment may be worth five ordinary questions.
6. The facilitator or the leader of the group can play an enormous role in helping participants feel comfortable and included. A simple statement such as "I'd like everyone to weigh in on_______" works meeting miracles.
7. In terms of image, women always have a trickier road. They are expected to be nice. So go for competence AND warmth.
8. Speak up early to build momentum. Set a goal for the number of "participation opportunities you will take"
9. The research indicates that one third of a meeting is a waste of time for you. Use that one third to plan what you want to say.
10. We do have control over our communication. Coach yourself and seek resources to add to your speaking up toolkit.